All the difference
by Lanilou
Summary: His night lamp, a little yellow spotlight glowing next to his bed, illuminated the room just enough so he could see Amy lying next to him.
DISCLAIMER: Do I still have to? Ok, here it goes: None of TBBT is mine, no money is made, NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT INTENDED!

Author's note: Mh...it's been years...please be gentle. Oh.. and I don't have a beta and English is not my first language...

For her to stay the night was still a novelty. He was sat up in his bed, leaning back against a couple of cushions, the covers pulled up to his waist but no higher so they wouldn't cover her head. He didn't want her to feel suffocated or trapped, like he would.

His night lamp, a little yellow spotlight glowing next to his bed, illuminated the room just enough so he could see Amy lying next to him.

She was lying on her stomach, the covers up to her neck, face away from him. Her head was next to his waist, the dark strands a mop on her head and brushing against his skin. One arm was draped over his legs, holding onto him, the other he couldn't see. Her own legs were stretched out down the length of his bed, limp and relaxed.

His bed.

He did this a lot, sat and watched her sleep. It was a strange thing for him to do, he usually maintained a strict schedule of having at least eight hours of sleep and when he couldn't sleep he worked. It wasn't like him to do almost nothing like this.

To sit here, like this, silently and observing, was just not like him. Though he wasn't entirely still, his hands were occupied. He stroked her back with his right hand, smoothing his palm over her soft skin, gently massaging her shoulder every so often. His left hand was wrapped around the wrist of the arm she had draped over him. He moved his thumb back and forth over her skin, rubbing firmly so that maybe she would feel it in her sleep.

He had often wanted to ask if she would feel his caresses in her sleep but he wasn't sure how to broach the subject. He found he still couldn't talk about intimacy easily, neither before nor after they had started sleeping together.

He couldn't talk about it, because, for once, he didn't seem to find the right words. He couldn't express how much it meant to him. Because he loved her. Because she was important to him, more important than even physics.

That wasn't like him either, to have a person to be an important part of his life like this. Equations were important, technologies and numbers and theories. People were just background. To some extent even his family, even Penny and Leonard, but not this woman. He hated to admit it because he wasn't sure he was capable pf putting another person ahead of himself. He wasn't sure he was capable of putting another person ahead of his work.

He suspected however, that Amy might understand that herself. And maybe this basic understanding made all the difference.

He was in love and sometimes the depth of this feeling scared him.  
He was tired and he knew he could, and should, sleep, but he found himself enjoying this. Just sitting and feeling. Enjoying good emotions, instead of fear or frustration.

She shifted beside him, turning onto her side, her arm sliding across his legs. Lazily, she tugged at his pajama trousers and he moved some hair to one side to see her smiling, her eyes still closed. She moved forward to kiss him and he smiled at the confused look on her face that appeared when she kissed the cotton of his nightwear. She opened an eye and looked up at him, before frowning and shutting it again.

"Why are you awake?" Her voice was thick, and muffled by his leg.

"Why are you awake?" He countered.

"I'm not awake."

"Talking in your sleep?"

"Just answer the question."

"Shhh, you're asleep and you probably won't remember this in the morning so I'd rather not waste the energy explaining to you the complexities of why I'm awake at half past three in the morning." He grinned.

"It's a good thing I love you so much or I'd make you sleep on the sofa."

Sheldon swallowed, marveling at the feeling washing over him for the moment. "Yes it is." He whispered.

"Next time I might hit you with a pillow."

"The next time you tell me you love me, or the next time I annoy you?" She growled, huffed and turned over. Sheldon grinned from ear to ear. "I love you too." He said, trying not to laugh at her or at how happy he felt. He settled back, spooning her and enjoying the warm comfort that she gave him.


End file.
